Crying on the inside
October 23, 2006I spotted this paragraph in an article on Bindi Irwin -
At one friend’s house, Bindi has opened up conversations about grief. “Why does she look so happy if her dad died?” came the question from my friend’s seven-year-old son. We had a similar conversation at our place a few years ago when a child at my son’s school lost a parent and many of the other kids didn’t understand how their classmate could play and laugh and not be constantly crying.
My friend explained to her son that, even when a devastating thing happens, you can’t be sad every minute of the day. And just because Bindi looks happy when we see her on TV, it doesn’t mean she’s not crying her little heart out in private.
It does raise some questions about the grieving process. No, you can’t be sad every minute of the day. In fact it’s often a huge relief to be able to enjoy life and laugh and play. Most people don’t cope well with constant depression and stress, especially from the deaths of loved ones. If we don’t take the time to enjoy life, we’d probably never stop crying.
People’s reactions to the grieving process always seem to differ between two extremes. It’s either “Why isn’t she more upset?” (re: Bindi), or “Just get over it!” (re: Diana). Both extremes are insensitive, and don’t take into account how diversely humans react towards different situations.
